SKU: 59872769232

Apocalyptic Ape #3100 Kids "Not Hot" Sauce

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Ships within 48 hours · Estimated delivery Aug 8 - Aug 13

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Description

Apocalyptic Ape #3100 Kids "Not Hot" SauceNot Hot Sauce Training Wheels for Future Spice Lords Not Hot Sauce is what you get when you want all the chaos of Apocalyptic Rations flavor with none of the fire department involvement. This bottle is built for tiny rebels, spice cowards, and flavor fans who want zero burn and maximum drip. Cane sugar, peaches, and red chili puree come together to make a sweet, tangy glaze that tastes like a fruit stand that survived the apocalypse. Tomatoes, jalapeo

“Not Hot” Sauce – Training Wheels for Future Spice Lords

“Not Hot” Sauce is what you get when you want all the chaos of Apocalyptic Rations flavor with none of the fire department involvement.

This bottle is built for tiny rebels, spice cowards, and flavor fans who want zero burn and maximum drip. Cane sugar, peaches, and red chili puree come together to make a sweet, tangy glaze that tastes like a fruit stand that survived the apocalypse. Tomatoes, jalapeño peppers, cayenne, and capsicum oil are present in micro-doomsday doses, just enough to bring authentic chili flavor without lighting a single tongue on fire.

Vidalia onions (1.34% by weight, because we’re nerds) plus minced onion and salt lend that mellow, caramel-y, savory note, while vinegar keeps it bright and dippable. Smooth, clingy texture that coats nuggets, fries, and anything your future hot sauce fiend is willing to test.

This is the gateway bottle. Today, “Not Hot.” Tomorrow… Scorpion Dust.

Flavor Profile:

  • Sweet: Cane sugar, peaches, and tomato for candy-adjacent glaze vibes

  • Tangy: Vinegar and chili puree keep it bright, not boring

  • Savory: Vidalia onions, minced onion, and salt for gentle umami depth

  • Chili Flavor, Zero Fear: Red chili, jalapeño, cayenne, and capsicum oil in baby-step amounts

Heat Level: NONE
All flavor, no fire. Approved for kids, grandparents, and people who think black pepper is “a lot.”

Best Deployed On: Chicken nuggets, fries, tater tots, mac and cheese, grilled cheese, pizza crusts, rice bowls, and any bland post-collapse snack in desperate need of sweet, tangy, zero-risk chaos.

Ingredients: Water, Cane Sugar, Red Chili Puree, Vinegar, Peaches, Jalapeno Peppers, Salt, Minced Onion, Tomatoes, Vidalia Onions, Cayenne Pepper, Xanthan Gum, And Capsicum Oil.

Refrigerate After Opening. 1.34% Vidalia Onion by Weight. May Contain Pits.

Shipping Notes
  • Free Standard Shipping on $100+ Orders to the USA.
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Exchange/Return Notes
  • We offer a 30-day return/exchange service after receiving.
  • Final sale items are not eligible for returns or exchanges.
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SKU: 59872769232

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4.5 ★★★★★
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Luchirri
Natrona Heights, US
★★★★★ 5
Cuida tu piel
Style: New formula!
Excelente para la piel, especialmente para el rostro. Lo deja suave. Lo recomiendo
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Reviewed in the United States on April 8, 2026
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Hilogirl
Natrona Heights, US
★★★★★ 1
Nottt gentle
Style: New formula!
Um what? This is NOT unscented it has a super strong perfume smell and also it made my eyes burn so bad. It’s not gentle and I would not recommend for sensitive skin
WAS THIS REVIEW HELPFUL?YesReportShare
Reviewed in the United States on January 10, 2026
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Sock_Bunny
Houston, US
★★★★★ 5
Makes moving your umbrella around a breeze.
Size: 100LBS
This is best idea in umbrella stands. Decent price. I love that the water intake/release is on the side. Many are on top of the stand. Doesn't leak. Easy to move around and easy to put together with the included tools. I have 2. One for a very heavy 10 x 6' umbrella, and the other for a very light 1/2 round umbrella. Works equally well for both. One tricky part the instructions don't include is that is parts F and J are 'in place' in the base and you need to remove them to re attach them to the cylinder, or what they refer to as the "stand pole". So, if you are looking for parts (and I did this twice), just remember you will find them on the underside of large plastic umbrella base. Both are black, and so not immediately apparent. Love that there are two locking wheels and they include an extra screw. IKEA could learn a few things here.
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Reviewed in the United States on August 6, 2025
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Karl monroe
Dallas, US
★★★★★ 5
This product will fit your every need!!!
Size: 100LBS
Very sturdy, Easy assembly, appealing look and easy to move around. very satisfied with this Product!!!
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Reviewed in the United States on November 18, 2025
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Julie A. Loftus
Louisville, US
★★★★★ 5
Hold my umbrella & watch this!
Size: 100LBS, Size: 100LBS
This product does a fantastic job of keeping our umbrella perfectly vertical. We previously had an all metal one which cost over $100 and fell over all of the time. I love the fact that it can be filled with sand and water to ensure it does flip over! We opted to just use water and it is performing flawlessly! The wheels make it easy to move or they can be locked in place. The assembly was very straightforward and took about 20 minutes. I would buy another one if we need it for our second umbrella.
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Reviewed in the United States on June 22, 2025

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